First Life

I am standing by the battlefield on the raised walls of our fortress overlooking our vast army. Undefeated in the long history of our empire and myself one of its greatest generals, I feel incredibly proud. My skull helmet is affixed to my head, my light armour is on and though I do not have my sword or spear to hand I already feel the anticipation and exhilaration of battle.

Standing to my right is ... my right hand man. Though still very young (little more than a boy in fact) he has proved himself many time in battle and saved my life more than once. An orphan, I found him when he was just a child and took him in and raised him as if her were my own son. Indeed more than that he has also become my protege. Trained in the army and the fighting arts since young, he has become one of the most skilled and deadly warriors in our vast army and easily my most trusted adviser. Jealousy of his elevated position and standing exists amongst the men, but it is tempered by a grudging respect. Few could hope to match him in swordplay or wits.

So here we stand above the soon to come battle scene surverying our men. But .. does not share my good spirits and elation.

"... I have a bad feeling about this battle. My dreams have been troubled of late and I feel that this is not our time. Let us sit back for this one. There is no need for us to be at the forefront of the action. I feel that we will be in real danger this time."

I know that ... is no coward, so hi words must be coming from his heart, but nevertheless the battle looms and there is glory to be achieved.

"... worry not! How many more battles before this have we fought and won? How many times have we risked our lives and emerged victorious?"

"I know these things ... but still I feel fear for us in this battle."

"Fear not ... . Reposit your trust in me. I will not let anything happen to you whatever the cost."

"not only me..."

"Both of us. I will let nothing happen to either of us."

"You feel sure...?"

"Yes, I pledge to you that nothing shall happen to you on this field of battle and that we shall walk away happily and unscarred to enjoy great victory celebrations and a rich life once more!"

"I see. My trust is in you then, my brother and leader."

Then out to battle we go. ... and I fight bravely and powerfully, but the tide of this battle is against us, against our army. I start to feel the first pangs of despair. It seems we may be overpowered, it seems we may lose. I have lost sight of ... I start to panic, looking desperately around. Then I catch sight of him in the distance to my right. He is surrounded by the enemy on all sides and they are hacking and slashing at him from all angles.

"..." I bellow at the top of my lungs.

"..." he calls back weakly, fear in his voice.

I renew my energy and start hacking towards him like a madman, terrifying fear and desperation clouding my senses. I fight, cut, parry, cut, carving down men in front of me as I force my way through to him. I am unaware of any wounds I endure or damage done to me, I just keep pushing on. I have almost reached him, he is just byond me and suddenly he is stabbed. From behind him, right into his left shoulder blade a spear goes crashing into and through him.

"Noooo...." I hear myself call. Then another is cutting him from the front with his sword.

"Don't let it be too late, don't let it be too late, don't let it be too late." I cry in my head.

then I'm upon them like a dervish. I cut them down slicing left and right around me, destroying the force around him. Then miraculously my men are there holding the tide back for a while. I drop to my knees and pull ... up to my chest.

"It's going to be alright, it's going to be alright" I say and I realise I am crying.

He looks up at me and says weakly "I told you. I told you, but you woulodn't listen."

I am overcome with pain. My heart feels like its going to burst. My physical wounds seem nothing in comparison to the anguish I feel inside.

But I can only repeat "Its going to be alright, its going to be alright"

He looks at me very directly and his eyes are filled with anger, pain and suffering and he says slowly... so slowly that I hear every word for an eternity:

"You promised me"

And as his eyes stare at me filled with angry tears, his determination hardens
and then fades
and he is gone...

"Noooooooo....."

I scream and scream, unable to think at all, my mind filled with sorrow beyond my ability to understand it. Then white pain rips through my back.

"Ahhhhh..."

Then more... my arm, my front. I can barely breathe, my lungs are filling with blood, I can hear my breath bubbling in my throat and then...

Introduction

This blog tells the story of me and my ex-girlfriend.

But not in the way you might think.

Let me 1st tell you the story of how me and my ex-girlfriend met...

I was sitting in my office one day when I heard a female speak. As soon as I heard her voice my heart started beating like crazy. I wanted to jump up and run across the room and talk to her. I felt desperately that I needed to talk to her. It WAS crazy! I hadn't even seen her face and didn't even know who she was. Nor did she have an incredibly beautiful voice. She pretty much had a rough cockney-style accent (later discovered to be Portsmouth). I wanted so bad to go over there, but couldn't think of a good excuse and then after a very short time she was gone.

The next time she came in, I had exactly the same reaction, but this time I was determined to meet her. I went over and made some excuse to talk to the staff manager who's desk was in front of her, then fate lent a hand as she was having trouble with the photocopier. I went over to help, talked to her for a bit and within 8 months from that point we were dating. She said on that first day I kept staring into her eyes like an alien, as if I was trying to bore my way into her soul and dig out everything. She even commented on it whilst I was standing in front of her on our first meeting.

It's hard to explain, but I felt so alive standing in front of her, my heart was beating so fast, my aura seemed enflamed, my spirit was spreading out around me in fire.

What does it mean? Well, basically I felt so connected to her. So incredibly connected to her. I felt like I was in love with her before I even spoke to her, from the moment I heard her voice.

When we finally started dating, more and more came out of this. My feelings for her never decreased an inch, in fact they increased with every year that went by.

You see I felt and have always felt that I knew her before, as if we had a connection that went back far before this current life. And as I dated her for longer and longer, memories started to surface...

This story is the linking together of those memories from the absolute earliest to the most recent, to try to string together the story of mine and her relationship from it's earliest beginnings till it's current end.

The story of me Chasing her Through Time.